This is Eli

A blog about Eli. A blog about survival – and by that, I mean life!

Hello! This dark, strange trip into the hard-boiled world of Mary Kay makeovers doubles as a fundraiser for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. Hey, I never said I was normal. This is the first in a three-part series.


Please vote for my makeover in the Mary Kay One Woman makeover contest. You can vote up to five times a day through May 28. If I get the vote, Mary Kay will donate $5,000 to the CF Foundation for cystic fibrosis research that will help save my son Eli’s life.

Vote for me, fund lifesaving research to help Eli

Here’s the link. Start voting, start sharing, and enjoy my strange detour to a new genre: Mary Kay noir.

Moby giveaway

This is a moss Moby.

This is a moss Moby.

In addition, I’ve tied my vote campaign to a fun giveaway – a free Moby wrap thanks to Moby Wrap, a company run by some together California hippies. The free wrap is moss green. It’s a cozy, comfy baby carrier that retails for about $50. Wee bbs love it and parents get their hands back! The contest is limited to US residents only.

Find the details on the giveaway and for my story, A Mary Kay makeover in noir, part 1, below the jump:

3 steps to enter this giveaway:
1. Go to Eli’s Facebook page.
2. Like his Facebook page AND
3. Share the link to this story from his Facebook page.

Below, enjoy my story in audio and words. I had the help of my assistant, Spiderman Cowgirl Princess

A Mary Kay makeover in noir, Part 1

It was a day like any other day when I got the call.




Sutton was on the other line.


“Fancy hearing from you. You know I’m out of the game.”

She offered me a free makeover.

“Nothing’s free in this world, sweetheart.”

I hung up the phone.

It rang again

“No. Really. We’d like to make you over.”

“Yeah, why? What are you trying to say? What’s the catch?”

“The catch?”

“Yeah, the catch.”

“You come see Mary. Mary Kay. You do the deal, you get the money, get it?”

“I don’t do deals any more. Been burned too many times. I’m out of the game, I tell ya.”

“This deal’s different,” Sutton says.

“Different how?”

“This deal will save your son.”

“What do you mean? What’s he got to do with it?”

“Come to the office. Mary’s in the back.”

“What’s this have to do with my son?”

“Listen,” Sutton says. “Here’s how it works: Before. After. Come to the office. That’s how it works. You see Mary. You do the deal and you’ll get the money.”


I hung up the phone.

I had to find my assistant.

Spiderman Cowgirl Princess.

I found her on the couch. Milk cartons, chocolate syrup, all around.

She was in a stupor.

“Get up. Get up. We’re going to do a deal.”

“Mommy we don’t do deals any more.”

“This one’s different. Come on.”

Spiderman Cowgirl Princess and me walk to the minivan. We ride to the office. Get out of the minivan. Walk through the office door.

And I couldn’t believe my eyes.


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